Recognizing and Revising Self-Talk Patterns

Inner Critic

• Definition- “The Inner Critic judges self, blames self, complains about self, and demeans self. Its positive intention is to protect self from failure, but the actual result is either a partial attempt or no attempt at all.”

• Identity- While taking my first Landscape History test this week I caught myself saying to myself “You can’t pass the test because you’re not good at history”. I had studied for the test, but I didn’t exactly feel as confident in it that I should have.

• Revise- I will have to start thinking to myself more positive thoughts than I have before. I will also have to start doing more thing prior to situations like that because that way I won’t even give myself a chance to even be put in another situation like this.

Inner Defender:

• Definition- “The Inner Defender judges others, then blames them before self-assessment takes place. Once blaming an external takes place, complaining about the external and demeaning the external replaces problem-solving and escape occurs. Its positive intention seems to be fending off criticism and punishment from others.”

• Identity- This past week I was doing one of my homework assignments I caught myself saying “This isn’t your fault that you don’t know all of the material completely because the teacher didn’t teach you everything that you needed to know”.

• Revise- I see now that I’m going to have to stop blaming other people for the things that is really my fault. I will have to start to take responsibility for my own actions which cause me to start to thinks things like that to myself.

Inner Guide:

• Definition: The Inner Guide offers an objective and wise perspective about ourselves and others. It doesn’t self-demean; it doesn’t attack. Our inner guide tells us the absolute truth and allows us to be more conscious of reality, other people, and ourselves.

• Identity: I was sitting in my Math 1020 class getting my very first quiz grade back and I was very nervous. When I got the grade back I noticed that it wasn’t what I had wanted and I realized I was saying to myself “It’s okay, you know you’re going to improve and everything is going to be okay”.

• Revise: I feel like I need to honestly keep this trait around. When I said this to myself I really felt as if I felt better about the grade even though it wasn’t what I wanted in the first place.

Summary

After doing this part of the portfolio I realized that the “Little Voice” inside your head can have a huge part in your life and you wouldn’t even know it. The way that you talk to yourself about things that you are doing could change your whole mood for the day. It could be the reason why you have the best day ever or even the worst day ever. It’s just how you go about listening to what you are saying to yourself. It is said that everyone has a “default” inner voice that they constantly listen to on a daily basis. I believe that the inner voice that I listen to on a daily basis would be somewhere between the “Inner Defender” or the “Inner Guide” because every day I tend to catch myself saying to myself the things that they would be saying. I feel like having a inner voice that is a mixture of both of these is honestly very helpful. I think that this could very possibly be the most honest voice that a person will have. I will forever be telling myself the truth about situations instead of lying to myself saying things like “I can’t do this” when in reality all I have to do is study more or try harder and I will understand what I am doing. So, with this being said, I feel like I wouldn’t change this about me. I feel like this inner voice is and has been working for me for the longest. If I think back far enough and hard enough I can actually remember saying some of the things that the inner defender and inner guide would say and it got me in a pretty good place in life so far. But, honestly I feel like that if I keep that inner defender part of me there, in the future it will eventually start to take me down the wrong road because I will start to blame others for things that I should be taking responsibility for. If I was to go to the full inner guide inner voice for myself, I could see in achieving so much more in the future because it will help me to build more confidence in myself to do things that I would of never thought of doing or things that I didn’t think that I could do at first.

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