People were talking about how I was wasting my life by not going to college and just partying my early adulthood away.
When I first started hearing it I did not know what to think. I wanted more than anything to defend myself. I worked hard. I worked every day.
I wanted different things than everyone who was in college in the town, but now I felt so much shame for having different dreams than everyone else.
At first I defended these things, but after a while I started to feel as though I should feel shame for not being in college. Fall semester rolled around and I felt so bad about what people were saying about me, that I decided I would enroll in fall classes.
I was doing something I did not want to do, spending $5,000 only to combat a shameful feeling that judgmental people had put on me. That semester was the worst three months of my life.
My relationships failed, my effort at work slacked, and so did my grades.
I was not in a place that I needed to be.
Lucky for me it only took me one semester to realize that I was not doing this for myself and that I needed to stop wasting my time and money on something I had no desire to do.