Writer’s Statement

From an email I sent to my friend Jeff on November 5th, 2017 @ 7:18am:

“Ah, yes. I've never been very good at mundane interactions. It seems I am much more interested in the type of relationships I can cultivate on a closer level, which is probably why I so love sharing silence and intentional circles and meditating with others, as it allows me to experience an intimacy with people that I can revel in on a deeper level and absorb into my bones. But, as I do also much enjoy sharing those "other" aspects of life with those I hold close and dear, I will offer this: I was born & raised in the suburbs of Philly and moved west a few days before I turned 19, with my boyfriend at the time. In short order, though, I realized that he and I were not meant to cohabitate and he moved back east. I am an only child and my hobbies include, in no particular order: writing, photography, hiking, paddle-boarding, writing (it's worth mentioning twice based on how much I do it), reading, volunteering, community building (I consider it a hobby because I love doing it), playing music, listening to music, and dancing like no one's watching even when there are, in fact, people watching. My main interest in life includes anything which serves to allow me the chance to hone and sharpen my spiritual life's pen, so to speak, which I consider to be the best way in which I can support and assist others, which is my greatest motivation. Perhaps, then, my life's path can be whittled down to this: I am invested in caring well for myself so that I may care well for others.”

Choose To Shine

I cut through all the bullshh colors gashed deep in the fleshy parts of yesterday, draggin my feet like a tree with limbs bony and wet an image I won’t soon forget, like frost on branches daggers in the wind – and I’ll have to sit torso in bend just to see round the corner at what ails the common man –

and it’d be easier to sit but I prefer to stand in the mess of what’s been made, baking in the sun and hiding in the shade

And I’m at an introspective age where what makes sense seems pointless in the hands of ignorance in breed and here we all are in need of substance and integrity in this time of earthly holocaust and mute clarity and sometimes, I said, sometimes I just loathe opening my eyes to see what degradation has taken place since last the world spun around in the snow globe of space

And I’ve worn many a face pretending to be something I’m not, caught myself in the seat of the pants tryin to get away masquerading around

with nothing intelligent to say

And I decided in order to leave I had to learn to stay for all the wrong reasons, a moving statues of the seasons, melting and freezing, growing and weaving through the grains of time,

and the only life I can live is mine

and I can choose

I can choose

to be cynical

or I can choose

to shine

Production by Nathan Zavalney: Sound Engineer at Missoula Soundworks Studio. Design by Nathan Stephens at Groundswell - Design & Media Production. Photo credit: Nicole Dunn.



7:00 PM



In Gratitude

For my mother. For my father. For all those who’ve come before me: my blood, land, spiritual, cultural, and animal ancestors.

For those who share their daily lives with me: my husband Mike, my stepson Jaden, and our two orange cats. For my dear and beloved community of friends. For my sangha family, near and far.

For my teacher, Thich Nhat Hanh.

For all those who’ve inspired me with their artistry along the way, which is to say, well, everyone (truly) – but to mention a few that especially stand out: my grandmother Claire, Paula Abdul, The Grateful Dead, Ani Difranco, Led Zeppelin, David Sedaris, and Watsky.

For the opportunity to learn from both sides of the life spectrum: as a volunteer meeting with hospice patients and as a nanny working with young children.

For all of the causes & conditions that allow me to do all the things I am able to do.

For music, motorcycles & Montana.

For all the love I receive and am humbled by.

For breaking free of the ties that have bound me in the past so I can shine

(even & especially when it’s hard).

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