Now, the moment you’ve been waiting for. Drum roll, please! Ba-da! How to start your nation. One way to start a nation is to secede from an already-existing country. For example, if people in Kansas felt like nobody cared about them and they were known only as ‘The Middle’ they could see if the majority of Kansans felt this way and sign a petition. They could ask for permission from the government. Let me let you in on a little secret; IT’D FAIL. Sorry, just had to say that right now. But Jake, they could amend the Constitution… you’re thinking. No. No they could not. So basically, the only way to secede is Civil War II, or the state could wait for the U.S.’ downfall. Either way, it’s not ideal. The other way that might work is run away from your country with a group of people, find some random island, settle there, and kill all the native inhabitants, like the Pilgrims.
In conclusion, starting a country is far more than being triggered because your country elected a racist, misogynist, homophobic, orange, fake-haired pig. There are things you have to think about. For instance, the history of nations starting, the effect starting a nation would have on the world, and how to start a nation. But my advice? Be happy that the U.S. hasn’t faded out of relevancy yet. Thanks for that image, Washington Post. And on that note, goodbye, and thanks for reading my paper *cough* rant *cough*.