For liquid I opt for champagne, naturally, and for solids the beef carpaccio. It comes with a small egg/prawn/lettuce salad, a warm bread roll, and a Do&Co chocolate mousse thing. Even with all the reviews I'm amazed – everything is delicious. Well played BA!
I'm proactively offered another mini bottle of champagne which I obviously want. Oslo isn't a particularly long way, about 2hrs in the air, but they're serving us very efficiently. 1C manages to confuse the crew by asking for something like two separate whiskies and a sparkling water all at once.
As the "we're twenty minutes away" announcement is made I'm given a fourth champagne and, huh, y'know what I think I'm drunk now. 1C is offered a plastic to put his whisky in so he can keep drinking during our descent. My eyes have been fine since we levelled out but as we head towards ground my ears start doing that thing that ears do on planes, except yawning isn't doing anything.
I have a feeling my sinuses really are fucked. Bleurgh. Landing, we're told that the airbridge to the terminal is broken so we'll be getting off by walking down some steps and being led across the tarmac into the terminal. Then we're told the person driving the mobile steps has parked in the wrong fucking place. Finally we're told that it's very windy outside so the steps will be perilous. Good job my balance isn't affected by my ears eh?
Kevin pops up on Facebook and I point out that yes, it might be Tuesday still in Europe but I am indeed on my way to Sydney where I arrive on Friday. It's a 63 hour journey the way I do it, what's yer damn issue?
It's high comedy at Oslo. They let us down the stairs but the barrier at the bottom is still up. It takes a couple of minutes for anyone to start leading us in the right direction; we walk up some steps into the broken airbridge, taking a sharp left at the top right next to the wide open end that would normally be attached to the plane door. At the end of the corridor the escalator is not functioning and barriered off, and the door at the other end is locked.
Eventually someone removes the escalator barrier, but doesn't turn the thing on. Finally I'm in a long arrivals corridor, looking down at all the closed shops and bars. Apart from us, and one other flight whose passengers merge into our flow, the whole place is empty. It is 11pm I guess, but I expected a bit more. Dunno why.
At immigration I opt to use an automated gate rather than go to a desk; when I reach the front, a window pops up saying it's just updating its anti-virus software and I should wait a bit. Seriously what the fuck! But then I'm through, and successfully remember that I have a bag to collect. Given the time it took to get here it's not a surprise that they're coming out already, and mine arrives literally as I approach the carousel.
Because of the late arrival I'd opted to stay in the hotel that's connected to the airport, a Radisson Blu just across the way.