We all deal with depression.
We may not think we do, but we do. We've all lost somebody who is close to us. We've all felt the pain of lost friendships or relationships. We've all felt the pain of, well, high school. So what I'm mainly going to be covering two things on the emotional side of depression: What, and Why?
- Think of 7 words that describe you (don't mention anything about being rational or positive, let them think what they want to think). Be honest. Write them down. NOBODY is allowed to look at each others card.
- Would you call somebody else those 7 words to their face. Are you really being rational with yourself?
- Prime cause of depression: low self esteem
- I asked 10 of my christian friends, and 10 of my non-christian friends what they do when they're sad.
- Similarities: Listen to music, eat good food, get some alone time, take a nap, watch movies, and to a dramatic extent, 13/20 people asked said they forced themselves to cry.
- Difference: Obviously, among my Christian friends, a trending topic was alone time with God or reading the bible
- Sad difference: 10/10 of my non Christian friends said they talk to a friend to cheer them up. 2/10 of my Christian friends said they talk to a friend to cheer them up.
Depression is real. So what can we do to deal with it?
38 As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39 She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. 40 But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” 41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
So the answer is simple! Jesus! Jesus is always the answer! Right? Well, we live in a society wrapped around news, politics, media, and overall, quarreling. And when you're crying in a bathroom stall because of what just happened at school, Jesus isn't going to be there to throw glitter all around and spread happiness and unicorns. You're going to have a pretty hard time making godly decisions at that point in time. But His love isn't dependent on you. His love for us is solely dependent on His character, grace and goodness. Because we have put our faith in Him, he is always there. No matter what we go through.
But in the moment, how do we deal with the pain?
A few minutes ago, I talked about if you would tell somebody they were that person that you wrote down on the card. You all think of yourselves that way, but its just rude to call somebody else that. This is why we talk to our friends. They aren't trying to lie to you to bring you up. They know who you are. They know what a great person you are and you're the person lying to yourself.
When you're depressed, talk to God. See what he has to say. Then go to somebody who can help.
I really sincerely hope that every person in this room has a close friend they can trust and talk to. Please trust that person with your feelings. Its just as important to them as it is to you. And if you don't have somebody that you can trust like that, PLEASE come talk to Steven or your small group leader. Until 7th grade, I had those friends, but I hadn't realized the importance of them. They have dragged mr through a hailstorm of school, life, broken friendships, and much more that could have gone very bad for me.
What do I do when I find myself in the situation of helping somebody in this spot?
- Be there: In one of the darkest times of my life, I walked into a room with just me and my cousin. We sat there in silence for the better part of 30 minutes. Just having him there with me, and to know he cared, was one of the biggest things for me at the time.
- Care for them: Just buy them food. Honestly. This sounds really cheesy, but just the little things that you know they appreciate can mean the world to them.
- Patience: My cousin could have been doing so many other things in those 30 minutes, but he stayed there with me, and I don't think he knows how much that changed me for the better. Give them time. If they won't stop bringing themselves down, keep reminding them how much they really are.