Part 1: The Inner Critic
My inner critic has never been my enemy to be completely honest. I have always believed in myself and trusted that hard work would get me where I wanted. For example, this week I have a major test in psychology that I have to do well on and some people might be sitting in the library trying to study pulling their hair out from nervousness and not getting the right amount of sleep or eating right. Those are the type of people who let their inner critic get the best of them. However, that is not me. Occasionally, if I am overwhelmed with work, I may panic and try to think about how I am going to get thru it all, but I take a breathe and tell myself hard work will get me thru it. I prefer to trust my abilities and do the work to get what I need. However, what gets me in trouble is sometimes I don't work as hard as I need to or should be. Occasionally I slack off and don't manage my time well. Ive never let my inner voice tell me I could not do something. Sometimes I just struggle to make myself do the work I need to in order to get what I need out of something.
Part 2: The Inner Defender
Similarly as the inner critic, I have never been quick to blame others for my failure. In my opinion, everything that happens to you is generally a result of your actions. Occasionally, people get thrown curveballs and get screwed over, but in general your life comes down to the decisions you make. This semester, I have an macroeconomics class that is taught by a woman from China who immigrated in 2012. Her English is not good and it is very hard to understand her most of the time. I wanted to blame her at first but I have thought about it and realized that I could easily go to her during office hours and try to make sense of things one-on-one with her. In the future, I want to make sure I think about things before I blame something on others and really try to take initiative on my own to turn that blame into something positive and as a chance to improve myself.
Part 3: The Inner Guide
My Inner guide is probably my strength out of the three things I have written about so far. Like I mentioned in the inner critic, I generally know what I need to be doing and I always trust that hard work will get me where I want to be. My inner guide allows me to be aware of the situation realistically and do what I need to to fix whatever may be wrong. For example, I know I need to be doing this portfolio right now and that is why I am doing it. Most people's inner guide probably steers them in a similar direction, but like me some people also struggle to make the right decision and do what needs to be done. For example, my friend asked me to go to sit by the pool today and I have a test in two days. My first thought was how nice that would be because it is a beautiful day and its hot which would be perfect for the pool. The obvious decision is to say no and study for the test even though it is not for two days. This is exactly what I intend on doing, however, some people may think that they could put it off till the next day or just pull an all-nighter. Those are two mindsets that are unhealthy all around. My overall goal for this outcome is to learn how to learn how to make myself do the right thing as much as possible when it comes to my school work and life in general.
Part 4: Reflection
I would most likely consider my inner guide to be my default. I try to live my life in the present and plan for the future. You cannot change the past, so why dwell on it? Theres no sense in blaming others for what happens to you or spending too much time being negative and telling yourself you can't do something. Im not saying its not helpful to look back at what happened/what you did and examine what you can do to change it or do it right the next time. Thats always helpful, but it must be done with a positive attitude and with good intentions. Its not good to look for some to blame, but to look at what and why something happened.
I think its a very good thing that my default is the inner guide, because the inner guide is probably the wisest and most realistic part of the inner self, in my opinion. I have been working hard to control my inner guide in not letting myself get distracted from doing what needs to be done first. I was very tempted to say yes and go sit by the pool with my friend, but I know in my mind that I have to study because this test coming up is very important. In the future, I see myself making more decisions like the one with the pool situation. Last semester, I probably would have been overly tempted to go to the pool and most likely would have said yes. I would have thought to myself I can just study tomorrow or pull an all-nighter. But making the right choice is what successful people in life do even though it may suck to do so. Successful people have a solid inner guide and are very aware of their situation and surroundings. This is what I hope to achieve one day as I continue to work on my inner guide.