What is a friend?
Not a person who shames you
Not a person that calls you names
Not a person who makes you feel like you're doing everything wrong.
You do all of that, Leila.
Really, truly, THINK.
About what I have been through
All the hardships in my life
They have not been the easiest.
A hated one has become a friend
It harder than you think
He's someone who damaged me so deeply
Has said things that have made me whither to my bedroom floor
He has become a friend.
A loved one has died
My amazing grandma
In a casket.
Not the easiest thing in the world to get over.
Would be a really great thing to have right now.
I am bugged every day about if I'm keeping up in the book
It reminds me of how I was crying when I was supposed to be reading.
I am called self-centered
For trying to have self esteem at one of the hardest times in my life.
And I try!
I try to stay happy when you critizize me for being an actress.
I try to stay happy when you criticize me for playing the wrong note in band.
I try to stay happy when it doesn't even seem like you accept me
For who I am.
Please don't tell me
That I look like I'm wearing makeup
When I'm not.
Please don't get mad at me
For walking with another friend in the hallway for two minutes.
Please don't tell me that I'm wrong
Because I know when I'm wrong
And I know when I'm right.
I know myself best.
Please, let me be
And when you start acting like a friend again
I'll be willing to be
Your friend again.
But not for now.