“Child loss is not an event, it is an Indescribable journey of survival”
In my work I am invited in not only the very intimate spaces, the daunting and fragile too. In not only the happy endings but those that we accept their endings too 💕
The loss of a child is the most daunting any parent will ever have to go through. It is at this moment that support can bring so much comfort. There are many emotions, thoughts, worries and sadness that need tender care and love from the outside eye. A bereavement doula will help you go through the process as a family and plan a befitting ceremony for burial or cremation
Walking down hospital corridors in Amphia hospital - Breda
On Monday 4th June 2018, my work took me to Breda to support a lovely family going through bereavement. To witness the birth of their baby girl who was going to be born very early in gestation, a pregnancy that had to end due to fatal diagnosis. A choice no parent ever has to make about their own child and one that is so heavy and heart wrenching
That morning I made my way to them by train. I woke up, sorted my house and family, cooked dinner in my slow cooker , said a little prayer and headed to Breda. It took the whole day but I kept the mama company, leaving her once in a while to gather her own thoughts.
I managed to make another bassinet bigger following a thought I had on how tall she might be. I was right!
The same evening of Monday 4th June at 6:45pm I witnessed the birth of a little cute girl born at 17weeks 6 days just before the 5th month. The size of my hand 😔. It was an emotional and yet humbling experience to walk that journey with the couple. To see a baby so small, the innocence so beautiful yet sad. Her beauty stunned us all. So so precious, so still
In the train I finished the blanket
Sitting in the train enroute from a training in Amsterdam the day before her birth, I finished knitting the her baby blanket. I found myself talking to this little child in my heart with every stop telling her the names of the train stops she will not live to know nor see
Baby bassinet waiting ready with the parents birth plan
I still said Happy birthday little Maria Gabriella. I won’t see you grow nor visit you like all my doula babies, but I knew of your existence before I met you as Maria Gabriella. And that touched me. You came to a family I got to know and I will remember you always 💕
Little handmade basket made specially for Maria Gabriella 💕. I now call it the Maria Gabriella bassinet
I believe every “being” deserves a respectful treatment no matter their size. Making this little basket meant this child’s parents could view and cuddle their baby close enough and in dignity as opposed to Baby being wrapped in tissues or wash cloth
Welcome little Meisje, I am sorry you couldn’t stay. You were wanted, waited for and loved. Goodbye 💕💛