Domestic violence is any form of abuse that takes place in any relationship. Examples of domestic violence relationships include:
- Brother/sister, nephew/aunt
- Boyfriend/girlfriend, longtime partners, etc.
Dating violence is any form of abuse that takes place in a dating relationship.
Penal Code 27305-Domestic Violence / Corporal Injury
California Penal Code 273.5 is the infliction of corporal injury on a spouse, former spouse, cohabitant, former cohabitant, or mother or father of one's child, creating a “traumatic condition.” California Penal Code Section 273.5 can be filed as a felony or a misdemeanor.
As a misdemeanor, it carries a penalty up to one year in county jail.
As a felony, it carries penalties up to four years in state prison.
By “traumatic condition,” Penal Code 273.5 refers to a visible injury on the victim's body, whether significant or slight.
Cycle of Violence:
Abuse – Your abusive partner lashes out with aggressive, belittling, or violent behavior. This treatment is a power play designed to show you “who is boss.”
Guilt – Your partner feels guilt after abusing you, but not because of their actions. They’re more worried about the possibility of being caught and facing consequences for their abusive behavior.
Excuses – Your abuser rationalizes what they have done. The person may come up with a string of excuses or blame you for provoking them—anything to avoid taking responsibility.
“Normal” behavior – Your partner does everything in their power to regain control and ensure that you’ll stay in the relationship. A perpetrator may act as if nothing has happened, or they might “turn on the charm.” This peaceful honeymoon phase may give you hope that the abuser has really changed this time.
Fantasy and planning – Your abuser begins to fantasize about repeating the abuse. They spend a lot of time thinking about what you’ve done wrong and how they’ll make you pay for it. Then they form a plan for turning the fantasy of abuse into reality.
Set-up – Your abuser sets you up and puts their plan in motion, creating a situation where they can justify abusing you.
Dating abuse (also known as dating violence, intimate partner violence, or relationship abuse) is a pattern of abusive behaviors -- usually a series of abusive behaviors over a course of time -- used to exert power and control over a dating partner.
Every relationship is different, but the things that unhealthy and abusive relationships have in common are issues of power and control.
Violent words and actions are tools an abusive partner uses to gain and maintain power and control over their partner.
Consequences of Dating Violence
Dating violence can have serious consequences. While the immediate impact might be humiliation and/or physical pain, young people who experience abuse are more likely to be in physical fights or bring weapons to school.
They might exhibit higher rates of drug and alcohol abuse as well as high-risk sexual behaviors.
Speak Up If You Suspect Domestic or Dating Abuse
If you suspect that someone you know is being abused, speak up! If you’re hesitating
- telling yourself that it’s none of your business, you might be wrong,
- or that the person might not want to talk about it
keep in mind that expressing your concern will let the person know that you care and may even save their life.
Talk to the person in private and let them know that you’re concerned. Point out the signs you’ve noticed that worry you. Tell the person that you’re there for them, whenever they feel ready to talk.