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What You Can Do to Prevent Suicide

I have been wanting to do write this since studying the subject of incidences of suicide on the macro level in my sociology class last semester and never have due to being busy dealing with my own demons, until this morning. A buddy of mine posted the following query on Facebook.

How many of us would go sit with a person and just be present in someone's lives?

Not try to cheer them up or tell them how to fix it or even try to get them to do something.

Just sit and be present and let them know that in the current situation they’re not alone.

Too often we try to put our ways of dealing with things onto someone else and it ends up doing more damage...

Presence is powerful, but often overlooked.

To those struggling, you’re not alone!”

My answer? Unfortunately not many of us. If any. America has become an increasingly individualistic society.

French Sociologist David Èmile Durkheim conducted the study “Suicide” published in 1897 comparing the differences in suicide rates between Catholics and Protestants. He found that suicide rates among Catholics were lower due to the social controls of the church. He came to the conclusion that there was more to suicide than personal, individual, life circumstances, i.e. loss of job, divorce, bankruptcy. Instead he explained suicide occurs in the context of social forces not just psychological pathologies. He found two forces that are critical to societal suicide rates: levels of social integration and social regulation. Durkheim places suicide into four types, one of them being Egotistical Suicide which occurs due to excessive individualism and low levels of social integration. The individual becomes detached from others and senses little social support. The individual senses they are alone in life and life is meaningless. This type of suicide is more common in Western cultures.

So, the main question everyone asks, "What can I do?" or most tragically "What could I have done to prevent this?" The answer is simple...

When you see someone going through some shit put your phone down go to their house be with them. You don’t have to talk to them you don’t have to try and make them feel better. You just have to be there with them. This is more than just sending a text or doing a buddy check on social media, while these things make us feel like we are a part of the solution, it does nothing if very little at all. By physically being with that person in their presence you are making your presence felt. It doesn’t take much. Just go watch TV with them or take them some food. but don't force them to eat if they don't want it.

I recently went through a very bad and long break up, with my ex-fiancee. I remember I reached out to many people for help, because I had no one around me, I had no social support. I just needed to be with some one just around them. But many were just too busy. Didn't have time or just didn't want to get involved or "Just didn't want to get involved." Those were legit what some told me. I was going to a psychiatrist, but that's not enough. I was having suicidal ideations. I would look at anything analyzing it if it would be good tool to help me in case I did decide to take care of things myself. This scared the shit out of me and realizing this. I found NODA Hop Yoga (IG: @noda_hop_yoga) in Charlotte, NC at NODA Brew Co. on Sundays at 11 am. These amazing people have a $5 yoga class and a free beer included. (shameless plug). I met probably the least judgmental people I've ever met there. I looked forward to those Sunday mornings as they just took me into there circle after our yoga sessions and talked to me like I was just a regular that had been every Sunday before. Courtney, Josh, and Erica saved my life and I am eternally grateful to them.

We need a support system. We need people to be around and just be there. You don't have to talk to them. you don't have to drag them out to do something if they don't want to. If they don't want to. The worst thing you can tell some one with a mental illness is to "just get over it, just let it go, or you were an soldier and NCO, get you're shit together." Thats the worst thing you can tell some one. Because, if we could just get over it we would. There is nothing someone in this mental state wants more than, to not be in that mental state. How many times have you seen the "Buddy checks" on social media? While these intentions are good, how many times have you seen someone say anything to allude that they are dealing with shit in those posts? Not many if at all. The best way to be there for some one is to actually be there.

So this is what FerroVia is going to do. From here on out if you buy more than one of any item from our IGY6 line, one for your self and one for your battle buddy, 100% of the profits from the additional purchases will be donated to a non-profit organization aimed at suicide prevention. We will be holding a survey on our IG story and you will be able to decide which organization we will donate the proceeds to.

Created By
Tommy Williams
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Credits:

Monica Walters