Anastasia

Anastasia and Dmitry met at University of Moscow, he studied physics and she studied psychology. When he had is first position as a post doc in Netherlands, she decided to stay in Russia where she had been working as pedo-psychiatrist in a Children Center for kids with special needs in education in Moscow for the past two years. “We traveled a lot between the two countries to see each other. It was easier to do that between Russia and Europe than between Russia and United States... We enjoyed our time together, but it was exhausting.” So after three years far from each other she decided to join Dmitry for the last year and half of his post doc. There were some changes in the Russian's system of education, I liked my job, but I decided it was a good time to quit and so I did it.”

Arriving in Netherlands was not an easy task, even if she knew the country because she had visited a few times, she had to adapt herself to her new life. “ I didn't speak Dutch at all, I knew nobody there. So the first six months were difficult for me. I really felt lonely at the beginning... I had no motivation to go outside and meet people. At the Netherlands I worked at Russian school and I danced flamenco. Flamenco is my passion, so I was happy that I found the classes there. But still I felt bad and lonely without friends. In the end of my first year I started to draw as I always dreamed about. One day Dmitry shown me a website for artists where I could publish my art works. I hesitated to publish it but I decided to try. It was a great happiness for me when people started to like and even buy my works. I felt significant that I have something to do. My mood has changed and I started my English class and I has made lots of friends at my last 5 month at the Netherlands.. One day Dimitry even told me I had more social life than him.” she commented with in big laugh.

After Netherlands the couple had to move in United States for Dmitry's second post doc: “Our friends were happy for us because we moved in California... I didn't feel that way, neither my family. I have never been attracted to United States, and I actually never imagined on day I would live in this country. For me it was just moving somewhere else, far away, leaving friends again and starting over again. So in September 28th 2015 we arrived in Pasadena.” Transitioning from Europe to United States was an experience : “Our first shock when we arrived was that everything in this country tastes sweet... The food is so different than in Russia and Europe. We used to buy fresh food back there, but in US there is so much processed food. At some point I started to read the ingredient lists on packages in the grocery store! I never did that in Europe! And everything was expensive compared to Russia and Europe... It was a setback in our life.”

The transition form Europe to US had another impact on the couple. Distance to the family was bigger : “In Europe it was easy to go back and see our families a few times a year, in Pasadena it is impossible to do the same. Soon after we arrived in California, we discovered I was pregnant, so Dmitry and I decide it was not a good time to apply for Employment authorization. But for Christmas we went back to Moscow for a few weeks. Pasadena was too weird for Christmas, I didn't feel the spirit of the holidays. Maybe because of the weather. The trip to Moscow gave me an emotional power and I didn’t feel too bad in Pasadena when we came back. I restarted my drawing and I hope restart Flamenco lessons soon.”

As soon as they arrived in California, Anastasia joined the Caltech International Spouse Club. She took part of different activities and is now managing the weekly newsletter. “It was very helpful to join the club, I met new friends. But the most important is that I met people who went through the same experiences than me, and it felt good to talk and share about it. I realized I was not alone.”

Created By
Christophe Marcade
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