The Titanic is so amazing! My little sister Ava and I are always looking for some craic! The place we love to go the most is easily the first class lounge! It is jammers at night!
"Vinny! Come on! Let's go to the Turkish baths now!" Ava said loudly. I think Mum could hear her from our suite.
"You stook! Quiet down. All of Ireland can hear you," I told her in a whisper.
"Whatever. You got pishmires in your noodle!" she said olagonin'.
"Let's go. We are headed back to the suite," I commanded her. She didn't even bother to put up a fight since she was scondered, and her face was as red as apples.
As we were passing the smoking room, you could see the fluthered men having a few smokes.
"It smells terrible!" Ava said exasperatedly.
"I know. Those are just a bunch of muppets," I said very quietly. You could see my father in there. He was locked out of his trees like a monkey who forgot his keys.
After the smoking room was the first class lounge. It was filled with a bunch of caked and plugged ladies. When we finally got back to the suite, Mum was getting ready to go to the lounge and put us to bed.
"Goodnight you little pillocks. I'm going to head down to the lounge," she whispered since my twin brothers were already asleep.
"Ok," I said sounding disappointed. Whenever Mum puts us to bed, I always sneak out of the room and look at the water from the deck. It is so much fun.
Tonight I was staring at the water, and I saw something. It seemed like a big iceberg. Around it was drobes of an iceberg, but I knew the mighty Titanic could power through those. As we approached the iceberg closer, it looked like we were going to crash!
"The captain is such a pox!" I shouted. Luckily, no people were out there to here me offend the captain. It was getting baltic outside, so I went inside where it was roastin'. I was dead scared of that iceberg, so I went back to my room.
Later that night I heard some rustling of people. I was very daft and confuddled since it was very late. Then I felt a rush of wind, and I saw water coming up. I ran and ran, but I couldn't beat the water.
Irish and British slang:
- craic: fun
- jammers: packed and fun
- mum: mom
- stook: idiot
- pishmires: ants
- noodle: brain
- olagonin': whining
- scondered: embarrased
- fluthered: drunk
- smokes: cigarrettes
- muppets: dummies
- locked out of his trees like a monkey who forgot his keys: really drunk
- caked: lots of makeup
- plugged: pregnant
- pillocks: dummies or idiots
- drobes: smaller pieces of an object around the object
- pox: worse then other insults that mean idiot but still means idiot
- baltic outside: cold outside
- roastin': warm
- daft and confuddled: confused