The Primer With Melissa D. Body Joy Intimacy School

Welcome to a new way of viewing your self pleasure...

Your Guide Melissa D

Primer by definition is a cap or cylinder containing a compound which responds to friction or an electrical impulse and ignites the charge in a cartridge or explosive. That sounds exciting! Another kind of primer is a kickstart into the deep study of a particular subject or it is the base before applying the final coat of paint. The way I see it, the primer plays a vital role in the much needed preparation for moving forward and I like the word Primer because it speaks to what it means to explore the basics before going all in. This Primer™ you are viewing right now, is your first step… the preparation... the thing that will ignite you in getting a strong understanding in sculpting your custom erotic journey!

Before hopping right into the deep end of The Practice™, a program that I thoughtfully developed to support my clients, The Primer™ is a way to lightly dip your toes in the water before a full commitment! I have supported clients who felt frustrated, disconnected and not satisfied in their solo and or partners sex experiences. These clients were in need of a clear, supportive framework to help guide them closer to their goals in experiencing more connection, lasting pleasure or overall more fulfillment in sex. These tools support a variety of components of a person's unique journey. Now, I am not taking full credit for this entire body of work. In fact, there are many teachers who have inspired me to develop and clarifying these body-based erotic tools into what I offer clients today. Over the years, I have weaved some of the principles shared here that originated from trail blazers such as Joseph Kramer, Caffyn Jesse, Dr. Susan Kay, Dr. Charla Hathaway, Dr. Betty Martin and many other powerful somatic teachers who have paved the way for sex educators and teachers like me! Today, other experts who are considered Embodiment Guides and Body Based facilitators have empowering skills to offer clients that reach beyond talk therapy and jump light years ahead of quick fix protocols featured in popular "sex positive" social media sites. More on that later... lets get back how The Primer™ is f*cking revolutionary and how it will help you too to become more fulfilled and authentically alive!

Get Ready....

Much like many others students that come into my studio, I imagine you too are drawn to seek professional guidance because you need to be given the exact steps that will support you moving beyond what you are struggling with in your sex and intimacy. I saw a need for easy to follow, everyday tools that can be practiced at home, guiding students just like you on ways to becoming more present in pleasure. Through this work, you will learn about more of what you actually want, as well as learning ways to tap deeper into yourself and develop the ability to be in your body more- instead of stuck distracted somewhere else!

Journey Inward ...

The Practice™ is a deeply personal journey of self discovery, that will take you from stuck and limited patterns that you may be experiencing and moving you into more pleasure possibilities and this Primer is a perfect starting point. Becoming more embodied through this work is kind of like being stuck in a limited body posture for many years and all of a sudden having more access to the fullness of your body or full range of motion! More fullness It is what our bodies are designed for yet results do take a little focus, consistent practice and raw self awareness- let me show you how!

I am Melissa D, director of Bodyjoy intimacy school and I have helped a lot of people just like you - who are struggling to fully relax into pleasure and be comfortably and at ease in sex. Practicing the tools in this primer and also the deeper teachings found in The Practice™ will help address some of your stuck places and help you to begin to shift things!

The Primer consists of a simple worksheet, a meditation and a guided lesson that you can download and listen to on any of your devices - in the privacy of your home.

Below are some of the Primer activities and audios to listen to for a taste of the way that I work.

But wait… "What exactly are we going to be doing Melissa", you may be asking? Well, this Primer is about introducing you to the spark... the brilliant idea of maximizing the opportunity found in your self pleasure practice (wanking and jilling off) That's right! You can apply specific tools during your solo time that will greatly benefit you, rewire your response to pleasure and help develop new pathways and new ways of being sexually, overtime! The benefits will not only be felt for yourself but also in the way that you have partnered sex.

Do you cum / ejaculate way before you are ready to?

Is it quite difficult for you to achieve orgasm or ejaculation?

Are you distracted by your thoughts during sex?

Are there parts of your body that don't feel a whole lot of sensation?

Do you lack confidence or desire during sex?

Do you want to make your pleasure take up more space in your day to day?

Would you like to expand your sensations to be more of a full-bodied experience instead of only on the genitals?

If you answered YES to any of these... read on!

Primer activities below...

Primer Activity 1: In the Audios below, Melissa will guide you on how to drop into your body, slow things down and make connection with yourself in new ways through self-touch. Maybe you are slightly familiar with how to do this or maybe this is all new territory! There is a separate audio for those who identify as men and those that identify as women, so be sure to choose your own adventure and remember to have fun exploring and noticing what you notice!

How to prepare for the audio exercise below: Be sure that you have private time set aside where you will not be disturbed for at least 20 minutes start to finish. You can be in your room on your bed, lying back on the couch in a comfortable position or out in nature somewhere that feels private and relaxing to you. If you haven't already, open this up on your phone and put your earbuds in for easy, hands free listening.

Primer Activity 2: After listening to your audio, immediately write down or reflect on your answers to the following prompts:

  • What was it like to tune into your body?
  • What were you most drawn to: Sound, sensation, a distraction or something else?
  • What did you notice in this experience?
  • What was good?
  • What was something that you did not enjoy?
  • What surprised you, if anything?
  • What is something you are taking away from this audio self-touch meditation?
Consistent self touch will re-train your body...

Words of Encouragement

“I feel so much more throughout my body, I am able to better communicate what I like because now, I know!! Something else I have also practiced is to be more mindful right after sex and right after masturbating...I guess just pausing and noticing how that pleasure can last. “ Mr. B Austin Tx

"At first it was difficult for me to relax but then I noticed how good it felt! I am taking away the noticing that I live up in my thinking mind a lot and this practice helps me drop into my body, the moment and what I am feeling which has improved the quality of my sex a lot!" Brian T Santa Monica Ca

"I can't remember the last time I slowed down to feel my body in a non-rushed or goal focuses way! I can tell this is going to be different, but good for me! Thanks Melissa!" Emily G Boise ID

Want to take your practice to a deeper level? Check out The Practice™ here

What is included in The Practice™

  • Setting up your practice audio: The Where, How & Why
  • Elements that make it powerful and unique to you and your process
  • Easy to do processes that cater to what you need support with
  • Melissa’s custom 30 min & 60 min playlists to enjoy on your journey
  • A new, 45 min audio session lead by Melissa D
  • Invite to join our community of over 200 other like-minded erotic explorers who are also on the journey of The Practice™
  • Results that you are craving! By diving into The Practice, you will get the tools, support and spark that you need to shift from your current experience into a more fulfilling one!

Here is a sneak peek at some of the pages in The Practice

Creating your custom practice sample
Page from: The Practice™

I hope you have enjoyed this little taste-test of The Primer™ with me! If you like this or similar work, check out other free resources and more in-depth programs at BodyJoy.org

Work with Me: Would you like to work 1:1 with Melissa D to address some of your individual concerns, have professional guidance and reflection? Apply here. Custom audios available by request.

Check out our socials and all the happenings: Here

I am here to support you! - Melissa D


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