Writing your vows
First of all, please don’t be afraid to write your own vows. Please also ignore corny Hollywood movies and romance novels. They are not the real world and what real people say to each other.
Please don’t be afraid of public speaking, yes I get that you are talking in front of people. You are both saying these wonderful, personal and individual words you chose and wrote in front of the people that love and understand you the most. They won’t judge, they will think it is fantastic you have taken the time to write your vows. Some might even wish they had done the same after hearing your vows!
I have never had a bride or groom say to me that they regretted writing their vows or that it was a horrible experience. In fact, most comment that it was nowhere near as bad as they thought it would be. You are both in a great place of love and affection. Everyone at your marriage ceremony is there to enjoy your successes and to celebrate your marriage. They are not there to judge or rate your performance, quite the opposite.
If you struggle to start your vows, please look at my suggestions in the ceremony wording I have sent. You might like to use some of the wording and add your own personal thoughts and ideas. You both might want to write your wording but finish or start with the same three lines as each other to tie it together. There is no right or wrong here. The legal wording must be included, and I print out your vows with them included, so that isn’t something to worry about. Often people send them to me separately because they like that it is a surprise on the day. Others want to know what each other are going to say. Again no right or wrong, just your personal choice. Please use me as your sounding board or if you need any help at all. I’ve heard lots of vows in my time; I’m here to help you both.
If you have them, please ask me. Remember it’s your wedding day, and you need to know all the details, and there is no such thing as a silly question. I should know because I ask lots of questions, all the time.
The most important thing to remember is to have fun and enjoy the big day!