I can't get the line from Teddy Pendergraas music that goes 'close the door' out of my head .
2016 ... Christmas shopping rush, I was hoodwinked into taking our 6 year old daughter with me to the mall whilst the Mrs went to do her hair. Nothing to it I thought untill this 4.3 menace started to show size doesn't matter when it comes to delivering headaches and nightmares to a 50 year old man.
We were standing in the queue at the Milton Keynes NatWest bank , when my child started performing miracles with her rear end, There was a symphony of sounds followed by an ungodly stench that could only be described as a bad toxic substance that should NEVER see the light of day.
She stared at me and started laughing. I could feel eyes burning into the back of my skul as people muttered in absolute disgust.
Trying to control this rascal in a typical African parenting style, I stooped low and eye balled her and said . " Stop all this nonsense, when your get home you are grounded" What happened next was a thing of amazement . She stared right back and shouted back if you do I will tell grandma that I saw mummy kissing your pee pee.
These was dead silence in the bank you could see people were holding tears back in their eyes as they were about to burst out in laughter. I adjusted my jacket , cleared my thoat with a straight back dragged her out of the bank. As I walked out I heard a familiar voice saying next time your at it Please "Close the Door" I looked back and it was my pastor.
The whole bank let loose laughing and jeering.