Today; May 1, 2017, is a very sad day for me. For some people, it is the best day ever. For some people, their birthday was today. For some people, they were married today. Some people just had a great day overall. But my day was not like that.
Today, May 1, 2017, I lost hope.
At the very beginning of my freshman year of high school, I was approached by a girl. You. You came up to me and told me everything that has happened your first days here. Already, you had ran into sexual problems with an older students at my school. When I heard this, I was taken aback. This what not the "you" I knew. I knew somewhere in there, you were still there. So I tried talking to you. Try to talk you out of it. You promised me you wouldn't do what you had originally planned to do.
3 weeks later
You come to me and tell me everything that happened. Turns out you did do those things your promised you wouldn't. Turns out you had been keeping it from me for 14 days now. I went to my end bathroom stall on the 2nd floor on the left and cried. I'm not giving up on you.
4 weeks later
You come to me early in the morning. It happened again. 2 weeks ago, you did it again. I went to my end bathroom stall on the 2nd floor on the left and cried. I'm not giving up on you.
8 weeks later
You come to me one morning bright as day. You tell me about this boy. Everything you say lights you up with joy. It's the most happy I've seen you in months. But I knew this boy. I went to my end bathroom stall on the 2nd floor on the left and prayed. God, I need this boy to take care of her. I know he's been broken and I can't let that happen to her. I cried. I'm not giving up on you
A few long, long weeks later
I walk in the house covered in dirt and sweat. Long day of work. Emotionally exhausted. Physically also, to a degree. My iPad blips. I prefer all my devices to be silent, so when I hear a noise, I knows it's the only thing I left the sound activated for. Email from you.
"He dumped me last night."
I didn't sleep that night.
Jump to present
There were other things that went on in there. I'm sure you can remember them without me mentioning them. But today, May 1, 2017, you told me you were "talking" with an older boy. Another boy.
I was on my way to the end bathroom stall on the 2nd floor on the left. I saw you and that other boy. I saw you two talking. It doesn't matter what you we're doing, or where you should have been. That boy put a smile on your face that I have never given you once.
I'm sorry it had to happen this way. I've tried all I can. I'm sorry. If you're reading this, I love you more than you can even imagine to me. You have no idea the impact you've had on my life and how you've changed me for the better. But I'm sorry to say this.
I can't take it anymore. I hope somebody in the future can come help you.
I can't do it anymore.
Please forgive me.