I sit in the hospital waiting room, counting the number of chairs in between me and my best friend, Rowan. She came here to support me, and I know it was a nice thing to do, but all I want right now is to be left alone. I picture my mom coming out, telling me that everything is okay and that Adaline May is fine. I know this is just my perfect world getting in the way of reality, though. I know that my mom will come out and tell me, you can go now, and “It’ll be a little while before she can go home.” As I really start thinking about it, I start feeling tears in my eyes, and eventually running down my face. Rowan comes over to comfort me, and I can’t help but hug her back. This time I actually listen to her words of comforting, friendly sarcasm, “Everything will be okay.” The lady behind the front desk finally realizes that I’m crying and comes over. I push her away and run to the bathroom. I feel humiliated to know that people are seeing me like this. I feel so thankful that it’s a one stall bathroom, and I can lock myself inside.
When I finally decide to come out from my not so secret little hiding place, the nurse is out there waiting for me with my mom behind her. I decide to give her the evil eye. “You can come see her now,” she says right into my eyes as she starts to back away to give me my space. Finally. Someone who understands the “personal bubble” concept. I tell her, “sorry, not right now. I just need to get a hold of what happened.”
I have decided that I have said too much today since I am trying to avoid talking. I will just write Rowan a note so that she gets what I’m saying in a more understanding way than me just telling it to her. I go over to the tree of coloring sheets and flip it over. I grab a pen and start writing.
I think that I have had enough of this whole hospital thing for today. I hope that you understand what I am going through right now and I hope that you respect my choice of leaving right now. I’m gonna text my dad, so if you want a ride, check one of the boxes below