I want to create a world that in some way represents me. This space shows how I live and work with therapy to keep myself clam from depression that cause me unstable. I think this world demostrates how I define myself as a person, and how I live in this real world dimension. Walter Russell Mead said that "Utopia is a place where everything is good, Dystopia is a place where everything is bad, Heterotopia is where things are different. " I think look through this piece is similar as look into me at that moment. In this space, I am sharing what I see and feel as I am living right now.
The players will start the scene in a invisible box on a hand that has stairs going into the face with a clown mask. They can explore the space inside this box, but the only way to get out from the box is to climb the stairs. This head with the mask is an representation of me.
When players walk through the face and get to the top of the stairs, they will see a rotate bottle that has medicines inside under the top of the stairs. The medicines are flying up and are going into a tunnel. The players will also be able to see another space under their feet, but the only way to get to that space is to go through the tunnel. This tunnel represents how my medicine work inside my body. The medicines can only get into the most deeper part in my brain through my blood tunnels and my nerves, as well as the players can only walk through the tunnel to explore more space.
After transferring in the tunnel falls down, the players will see the second space of the scene. I create all the tunnels and manage them to pass through every part of the space. Inside this area, the players can choose either to follow the direction of the tunnels or just walking around. Those bouncing words "Relax" that I created in MAYA has rigidbodies that can be pushed by players. There are also some other objects are moving or changing. For example, the balloons are rotating, and the rotating coffee cups are changing colors.
All the items that I choose to place in this space have connection with myself in someway. As an example, the smile emojis are what I usually use to communicate with people daily. I choose this emoji because the smile of it feels more negative rather than shows happiness. The plane has one representation that identify me as an international student travels here to study. Another meaning of it rotating with only one point and never gets to fly into the sky shows that I am being stuck in my depression.
There is a door that closed the space. Players can only go inside by walking through the tunnel again.
There is a "No Return" sign outside the door. Which means if the player wants to get down to the center scene of this piece, there is no way they can return to this "relaxing" space anymore. If the players go through the tunnel, they will fall into an tunnel that go into an ambulance car. In the winter break, my grandmother got illness and me and my father were staying inside the hospital everyday. Since that time, the image of the ambulance car in the hospital always appears when I am having unstable emotion.
The red square on the ground is the way to go to the last scene. Players will fall from the space, going through soap bubbles and fall into a small square.
Inside this box is the most deeper level of my mind, and also it is the location that all the medicines in the tunnels are sent to. The middle of the box is a brain. This space is my deepest awareness, and also is the end of this piece.
Some of my models are from 3D warehouse. Also I created some of the models inside such as the stairs, the rotating face, the tunnels, the ground, the whole last scene except brain. The background music is called “やつつけ仕事” from Sheena Ringo. The images of sign and emoji are from google. There are two types of rotate scripts, two ramp scripts, bouncy and trigger effects in the piece. Also the top quote that I used here is from wikipedia.
My earlier concept was to create a space that involved multiple rooms which represented the disruption of my emotion and my thoughts. When I started to create these rooms, I was trying to remember the feeling that I had each time when I experience through depression, and I found out that it is slightly different from what my original concept presents. My emotions are not splitting but they are layering on each other at the same time, and that is why my mind will become confuse and my emotion will become unstable. So I changed parts of my idea. Instead of creating multiple separated rooms, I create a large space with different objects placed. While I am trying to work on this piece, I am developing my understanding of depression and my situation through researching and thinking. I think that help me to control myself better.