To the Girl Waiting for Her Future Husband: Stop
By Janie Peery
Wait. How many times have you heard that word? I’m guessing about a thousand, because that’s the amount of times I heard it in my high school youth group whenever the subject of boys and future husbands came up. “Wait for a man of God, wait for someone your parents will be proud of, wait for someone to cherish you, wait, wait, wait.” That was drilled into my head, and I believed it was the best thing to do. God was writing my love story, and He would bring me the right man if all I did was (you guessed it) wait.
Don’t do it, don’t wait.
I’ll tell you why. Because when you wait, you’re anticipating, you’re looking for something else, you’re not happy exactly where you are, with who you are. You create a void, and you think you’re incomplete.
Now hear me out, wanting a relationship that will end up in marriage is not only part of growing up, it’s a Godly desire, but don’t do yourself the disservice of waiting for it.
Because when you do, one of two things will happen. Either you will become sad, even depressed, because you don’t have a boyfriend and fear you never will, or you will jump on the opportunity to date the first Christian boy who shows the slightest interest. Both are unhealthy and spiritually and emotionally dangerous.
Live. Serve others. Spread the Gospel. Build relationships with friends, with other young women. Learn about yourself, about who it is that God made when He made you. Be totally, completely, wholly happy with who you are as a Child of God.
Then, when God brings a man into your life, get ready for your new season. For learning about him, and who God made when He made him, for building a relationship with him, for falling for him. Rejoice in the fact that he did not fill a void that you’ve been waiting for someone to fill, but that he adds to your life, to your heart.
Waiting and trusting are not the same thing. Absolutely trust that God will fulfill His plan in your life, even anticipate what He will accomplish through you, but don’t wait. Pray for the man you will marry, ask the Lord to grow him and to establish him in His word, but don’t wait.
Serve boldly, love compassionately, and continuously seek the Lord.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33
Father, thank you for being a God who already has our lives completely planned out, even when we don't. Thank you for caring about us enough that you crafted every single moment of our lives to work for our good. Father, allow us to be young women that run hard after You, young women that seek to know You more. Allow us to serve boldly in the season that you have allotted us. Lord, may we never be jealous or harmful of our sister who are living in much different seasons, let us love, support, and encourage each other. I am forever in awe of You.