Oh, yes, they have. Four types, in fact. Blimey. OK I'll have ... one of those then.
I am pretty hungry, having had a huge breakfast about 9 hours previous and since then only a pile of cashew nuts and two cans of stout. Of all the fancy stuff on the menu I am most taken by the burger and chips. The burger is nice, the chips less so.
I get a glass of bubbly and some nuts and a cold towel from the member of crew that's mostly looking after this aisle today. Another one comes and hands me some medium pyjamas; I say, oh those will be way too small on me to which she's like, really? Er, yes, really. She comes back with large a few minutes later, by which time a third member of crew has come along to thank me for flying with them again and all that stuff.
But look, never mind all this attention, I want to watch Deadpool. How had the world been keeping Deadpool a secret from me for so long? Unlike on the way out with all that entertainment system grief in one way or another, here both the handset and screen work perfectly and I'm able to queue up both Deadpool and Deadpool 2 and start watching before we even push back.
Which oil do you want for dipping your bread into, sir? I'll go with chilli, thanks.
Not really sure what this pre-starter thing (amuse bouche?) was, but hey, it gave me an excuse to dick around with focus and aperture and stuff. Plus it tasted alright, for the half a second or so it was in my mouth.
The crab dish for starter-proper was really very nice indeed. Some tie-in with a celebrity chef I've never heard of.
Posh mac 'n cheese for main. When this was brought to me, with a large smile she said "we've tried to make it extra photogenic for you sir, to help with your pictures". I mean really, fucking hell eh? Pity she doesn't know how badly I wield the camera.