My entire childhood was just a blur of innumerable things. I never thought that anything wrong would to my family, but I was wrong to think that.It was like any other day for me, My mother and I had just gotten home from daycare. My mom was acting a little eerie, but I didn't put any interest into it. I sat down on the couch and started to watch a movie. Few moments after I realized my mom packing and stuffing our things into her car. At that very moment, I perceive my dad starting to wake up, then gladly he falls back to sleep not putting into mind what my mom was doing., Around 8 p.m my mom finished packing our belongings. Before we left, my mom grabbed a pen and paper and started to write; she explained how his drinking problem was affecting our family, so it was best for her and me to make our own path and leave for the best. We left, leaving all our memories behind, not looking back once. Very confusing, my mom explained how we would be staying at our aunt’s house until we find an apartment for the two of us. Few days after, I questioned my mom when we were going back, but she turned with a worried face saying that we weren't. It broke my heart once I realized what was going on.
Since we left, my dad’s drinking was progressing even more, so my mom revised him to a hospital to get detox. Few days after getting treatment, he relapsed. So he kept attending more hospitals to help with his addiction but It did him no good. He eventually started attending a rehab center, where I visited him a few times since the separation. Visiting him, I started to feel better, that he was doing good progress. Eventually, my dad’s drinking got worse, so he lost our house, and he began a new life, without a home to live.
This was the moment where I realized that my father and I were drifting apart, never seeing each other again. Growing up, I missed having a relationship with my dad, for it was difficult not having a figure in my life to look up to. Most of the time, I feel damaged/hurt that he never bothered to call me, or be there when I need him the most. . It has been almost 6 years since i've seen my dad.. I sometimes think that he could die with his addiction, and I won’t be there for him . His alcoholism has taken away the possibility, of having a father and daughter bond.
Till this day, it has been leading him to a sad condition. I am thankful that I have people around me that support and love me. Since the separation I have kept a good relationship with my dad’s family, every so often. My mom has been very supportive, and has been talking to me about forgiveness towards my father. But forgiving someone is not as easy as it sounds, Forgiving my dad, can heal my life in a better way of me reaching out to him, but I guess I am not ready yet.